Breaking the Mold on Growing Old

That's the point of this blog. That and providing readers with information on some of the perils, pitfalls and possibilities we'll all most likely be facing as we -- and our parents -- age.

One quick example: my father, an 88-year-old, disabled veteran of World War II who is suffering from Alzheimer's disease, was recently given a 24-hour, emergency discharge from his assisted living facility. The reason -- he was a "danger" to the staff. Now we’re not talking about Mike Tyson here. My father is so frail and unsteady he can barely walk. But the assisted living supervisor claimed he had "chased some staff members with his walker," and had become difficult, so he had to move out. Please.

Ridiculous? Yes. But so were the alternatives, as my sister and I soon discovered. In fact, I can sum up our options in one word -- none. None of the state agencies dealing with seniors or assisted living facilities could do anything about the situation. Dad had to be moved.

Okay, so move, right? Well, it’s just not that easy. We’re talking about rural Michigan, where it can be a real challenge to find a decent, reasonably priced facility with a vacancy. But here’s the thing – even in major metropolitan areas, it’s a real challenge. A friend here in LA figured that she would find a good nursing home by researching which ones had no lawsuits against them. She found one. One out of literally dozens. That’s what we Baby Boomers with aging parents – hence the name “Parent Traps” -- are up against. It’s only going to get worse, as more and more people need full-time assistance. And let’s not forget that soon the people needing assistance will be us.

The good news is that we finally found a nice place for Dad. But during the search, I learned a LOT and want to share it with anyone who can use it. Here’s a very short list of topics of upcoming posts:

· What’s the real difference between assisted living and nursing homes?

· Why the Deficit Reduction Act that passed this year should have been called the Rob the Elderly and Their Children Act (and a few other things!).

· An easy way to research nursing home and assisted living violations.

· Why the Veterans Administration is a better resource than Medicaid (if you’re eligible), and how to take advantage of a little-known benefit that could provide a veteran or spouse with hundreds of extra dollars a month.

· Advances that are being made in finding a cure for Alzheimer’s disease.

· How to slow the aging process, combat stress and maintain good health for as long as possible.

Things have to change. We have to find better solutions than what’s out there. That’s what this blog is for. Keep checking back. I’ll be posting new items as often as possible. And feel free to comment, correct me when I’m wrong and talk about your own experiences. I would love to hear from you!

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